30 mar. 2005

If you were going to get a pet, what kind of animal would you get? As I sd to my friend, because I am always talking, John, I said, which was not his name, the darkness surrounds us, what can we do against it or else, shall we & why not, buy a goddamn big car, drive, he sd for Christ's sake look out where you're going. I wanted so ably to reassure you, I wanted the man you took to be me, to comfort you, and got up, and went to the window, pushed back, as you asked me to, the window, to see the outline of the trees in the night outside. All night the rain had come back again, and again falls, the quiet persistent rain. What am I to myself that must be remembered, insisted upon so often? Be wet with a decent happiness. And and becomes just so. Semi-articulate flakes. One, and one, two three. I keep to myself such measures as I care for, daily the rocks accumulate position. There is nothing but what thinking makes it less tangible. The mind, fast as it goes, loses pace, puts in place of it like rocks simple markers. All forgets. My mind sinks. I hold in both hands such weight. It is my only description.

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