tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post111850393212045910..comments2023-08-29T02:42:23.063-05:00Comments on ¡Bemsha SWING!: Jonathanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118608915273632862005-06-12T15:41:00.000-05:002005-06-12T15:41:00.000-05:00Lehman knows a lot about writing bad poems. There...Lehman knows a lot about writing bad poems. There's always that temptation to sneak in something interesting.Jonathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118607235885472912005-06-12T15:13:00.000-05:002005-06-12T15:13:00.000-05:00one of my favorite assignments in lehman's class w...one of my favorite assignments in lehman's class was to attempt to write a very bad poem. most people's were good. it was fun to fail.shannahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17706867356078179503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118523141095143392005-06-11T15:52:00.000-05:002005-06-11T15:52:00.000-05:00Yes, we want something worse. God damn it, you ju...Yes, we want something worse. God damn it, you just have to work harder to be really bad! Get cracking!C. Dalehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17270640200393742125noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118522186017742712005-06-11T15:36:00.000-05:002005-06-11T15:36:00.000-05:00It's hard to write a really bad pantoum, I guess. ...It's hard to write a really bad pantoum, I guess. It does have that "teasing" quality C. Dale noted. I'll try to do worse next time.Jonathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118521934358188212005-06-11T15:32:00.000-05:002005-06-11T15:32:00.000-05:00I don't think it's horrible, but I do feel the fla...I don't think it's horrible, but I do feel the flatness here, Jonathan. I'm not sure if it's the form you've chosen, but your description of the poem itself as "dead" seems to make sense. The ideas though are interesting enough--Bobby D's daddy and so forth. The lines, though, are flat. The language is uninspired.Anthony Robinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15344532091414013818noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3759353.post-1118518232056067802005-06-11T14:30:00.000-05:002005-06-11T14:30:00.000-05:00I hate to ruin this for you, but your lines aren't...I hate to ruin this for you, but your lines aren't as flat as you would believe. The start of a pantoum, a form that seems quite capable of taking the most somnolent of material and making it strange by repetition and the surprise of how the lines take on different maenings as they progress, becomes anything but somnolent. The pantoum is a truly bizarre form. It is baffling in ways because no one I know has ever been able to explain its effects on readers well. Reading a pantoum and hearing one seem so disconnected it is almost like having two different poems. Maybe all poems are that way, but I don't think so. Anyway, going back to your lines, I would venture to guess that what follows will more than likely make or break the poem. But the lines, in and of themselves here, are merely teasing us. Funny how the pantoum seems to like the subject or "knowing" or "understanding" what the hell happened or is happening. Anyway, sorry for interrupting.C. Dalehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17270640200393742125noreply@blogger.com